So I'm finally ready to admit that being on exchange, and especially so in China is putting me out of my comfort zone. After all the little hiccups with the exchange application, the visa application, the matriculation card that took us 1 month to get, the housing conditions and now CUPL has introduced a new administrative problem of not knowing their own examination dates.
It is rather frustrating to receive an exam date schedule that only raises more questions than answers, there are no module codes, the tutors do not know either when their papers are, or what the exam format is, and appearing at the administration office only gives them a chance to refer us to this department, and then the next department and then the other department over there. And none of the staff knows the answer or who is in charge.
C'mon CUPL! You can do better than this!!
Indeed a huge step out of my comfort zone and learning how to keep my cool in times like this, with the uncertainty and wondering whether my travel plans will even materialise now or when I will go home. How I love NUS!
5/30/2007
5/27/2007
捉紧时间！
時間はゆっくり消えています。
でも、ゆっくりじゃない...速いですね！
でも、ゆっくりじゃない...速いですね！
生涯の日を正しく数えるように教えてください。知恵ある心を得ることができますように。-詩編 90編 12節
Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. -Psalm 90:12
求你教我们怎样数算自己的日子，好叫我们得着智慧的心。-诗篇90:12
Rest
Hello! I need rest!
Came home from church and was immediately knocked out for quite long. It started from deciding to go for a later service because I couldn't quite wake up in the morning, then popped by Sunday School for a while, then a group prayer that lasted almost two hours. By the time lunch came it was 3pm, I went home without following the rest to see the new Sunday School room in the new church building.
Which summarises my Sunday and how time just flew by so quickly when you're enjoying rest.
On the other hand, I learnt not to be too chummy with friendly, male, ang moh strangers. It is getting a bit unnerving to have too much of such opportunities in Beijing.
Came home from church and was immediately knocked out for quite long. It started from deciding to go for a later service because I couldn't quite wake up in the morning, then popped by Sunday School for a while, then a group prayer that lasted almost two hours. By the time lunch came it was 3pm, I went home without following the rest to see the new Sunday School room in the new church building.
Which summarises my Sunday and how time just flew by so quickly when you're enjoying rest.
On the other hand, I learnt not to be too chummy with friendly, male, ang moh strangers. It is getting a bit unnerving to have too much of such opportunities in Beijing.
最近
疲れましたね。
一ヶ月試験があるので、心配しています！だから、一生懸命勉強しなければならい。
シンガポールがいつも念していますね...大変！
日本語なぜ今までまだ上手ではないですが...大変！
いつもいつも「妹早く帰り」と思う、休みたいんです。
一ヶ月試験があるので、心配しています！だから、一生懸命勉強しなければならい。
シンガポールがいつも念していますね...大変！
日本語なぜ今までまだ上手ではないですが...大変！
いつもいつも「妹早く帰り」と思う、休みたいんです。
5/22/2007
Hard disk
failure.
But it isn't that bad, and I was surprisingly calm about it, after being distressed for a while. Decided not to send my laptop (I have named it Nakamura 中村, so that it has a name before it dies) to one of the dodgy servicing centres here cos I heard they steal your laptop parts, and I need to data recover too (costs about 2000rmb for professional data recovery) and probably change my hard disk. No lousy chiong hard disk for my Japanese product, yah! So I'm fortunate enough to have Fangxi's laptop to use for 2 weeks while she is in Shanghai, blessed enough to have my sister send Nakamura back to Singapore, and to have a geeky partner fix it for me, and then sending it back to Beijing.
On the other hand, it's so nice to be able to talk to Rixin who is on exchange in Taiwan. Sharing about different experiences and learning from each other. It's so comfortable sharing about the countries, our burdens and interests in missions. Haha, and going 'totally understand!!!' at every thought and emotion. MEET has been really useful through and through. Feels good to know that we're never alone.
But it isn't that bad, and I was surprisingly calm about it, after being distressed for a while. Decided not to send my laptop (I have named it Nakamura 中村, so that it has a name before it dies) to one of the dodgy servicing centres here cos I heard they steal your laptop parts, and I need to data recover too (costs about 2000rmb for professional data recovery) and probably change my hard disk. No lousy chiong hard disk for my Japanese product, yah! So I'm fortunate enough to have Fangxi's laptop to use for 2 weeks while she is in Shanghai, blessed enough to have my sister send Nakamura back to Singapore, and to have a geeky partner fix it for me, and then sending it back to Beijing.
On the other hand, it's so nice to be able to talk to Rixin who is on exchange in Taiwan. Sharing about different experiences and learning from each other. It's so comfortable sharing about the countries, our burdens and interests in missions. Haha, and going 'totally understand!!!' at every thought and emotion. MEET has been really useful through and through. Feels good to know that we're never alone.
5/20/2007
Food food food!
One year ago in faraway Mongolia, a bunch of bubbly girls on a mission trip were walking in the freezing cold rain in search of a guan (restaurant). It was the first day of the Nadaam Festival and they had just returned from watching the opening ceremony which looked vaguely like the National Day Parade back in Singapore except the soldiers were much more skilful and could ride and perform stunts on horses. And there were also formation dances, where kids danced on the stadium field waving huge gold ankle bones (playing with cow's ankle bones is one of the Mongolians' favourite pastimes).
So a bunch of girls, Aagii and Chris the missionary trudging in the rain in search of a guan, hungry and frozen. And because it was Nadaam, which was their huge huge huge national holiday, every single shop was closed.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Perhaps it's the misery of feeling cold and hungry and even more misery looking at the choice of food after we finally found a guan that was open for business. Mongolians don't have much of a choice, they basically eat the same sort of food everyday, which is understandable for a nomad's life. Hence every guan sells the same thing. I didn't really develop an appetite for bootz (meat dumplings) and huurshuur (meat pancakes) and other variations of oily meat dishes, and stubbornly stuck to calat (salad) for most of my meals.
Nyamaa teaching us how to make bootz.
Ernie, Joyce and MZ posing with their last huushuur. I can't even remember if I ate mine. If I did, it was probably done reluctantly.
Haluina's sister enjoying suteze (tea with salted milk, has more salt than milk and very little tea). I wasn't very used to this, but somehow Ernie and Rixin loved loved it.
But but but when we had a Singaporean food presentation for one of our English lessons, we prepared curry (canned food of course) which tasted glorious! And bak kut teh! (Yum yum) And rendang! (what is there more handsome?) My Mongolian friends commented never had I looked so happy seeing food in front of me.
So, dearest Joce (who was with me in Mongolia and hence knows I need this) presented me with curry and rendang premixes before I left for Mongolia. At the airport, I pleaded with the Cathay flight attendant to allow me to bring my precious Milo over despite my luggage being seriously overweight. Then Joel came over with Post Cereals, Milo and lots of San Remo pasta. Joel's mummy made JoBeth bring even more San Remo pasta, so I gave a couple away ;p. Then my sister came, more Milo and more Post Cereals. And suddenly Sida, Rachel, Nat and Jamie popped by after a transit at Thailand and viola! Mungbean dessert premixes and GREEN CURRY! Today Fangxi and Bona came with good ol' sponge cake and Bengawan solo kueh lapis, laksa, more curry stuff. With omg, Richfield's chocolate with macadamia! Two months to finish this!
So a bunch of girls, Aagii and Chris the missionary trudging in the rain in search of a guan, hungry and frozen. And because it was Nadaam, which was their huge huge huge national holiday, every single shop was closed.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Perhaps it's the misery of feeling cold and hungry and even more misery looking at the choice of food after we finally found a guan that was open for business. Mongolians don't have much of a choice, they basically eat the same sort of food everyday, which is understandable for a nomad's life. Hence every guan sells the same thing. I didn't really develop an appetite for bootz (meat dumplings) and huurshuur (meat pancakes) and other variations of oily meat dishes, and stubbornly stuck to calat (salad) for most of my meals.
Nyamaa teaching us how to make bootz.
Ernie, Joyce and MZ posing with their last huushuur. I can't even remember if I ate mine. If I did, it was probably done reluctantly.
Haluina's sister enjoying suteze (tea with salted milk, has more salt than milk and very little tea). I wasn't very used to this, but somehow Ernie and Rixin loved loved it.
But but but when we had a Singaporean food presentation for one of our English lessons, we prepared curry (canned food of course) which tasted glorious! And bak kut teh! (Yum yum) And rendang! (what is there more handsome?) My Mongolian friends commented never had I looked so happy seeing food in front of me.
So, dearest Joce (who was with me in Mongolia and hence knows I need this) presented me with curry and rendang premixes before I left for Mongolia. At the airport, I pleaded with the Cathay flight attendant to allow me to bring my precious Milo over despite my luggage being seriously overweight. Then Joel came over with Post Cereals, Milo and lots of San Remo pasta. Joel's mummy made JoBeth bring even more San Remo pasta, so I gave a couple away ;p. Then my sister came, more Milo and more Post Cereals. And suddenly Sida, Rachel, Nat and Jamie popped by after a transit at Thailand and viola! Mungbean dessert premixes and GREEN CURRY! Today Fangxi and Bona came with good ol' sponge cake and Bengawan solo kueh lapis, laksa, more curry stuff. With omg, Richfield's chocolate with macadamia! Two months to finish this!
Food, glorious food!
Eat right through the menu.
Just loosen your belt
Two inches and then you
Work up a new appetite.
In this interlude...
Once again, food
Fabulous food,
Glorious food.
5/19/2007
Doodles
Typing is bad communication.It's so nice to have someone listen and provide suggestions. Feeling a bit more hopeful already. Crossing my fingers for now.
Yup, thanks for the reminder. And thank you, my favourite teacher, for making me to do an assignment on the difference between death by hanging and death caused by strangling someone...
It's about time you do something related to school.
5/16/2007
He's gone home
Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. - 2 Corinthians 5:6-8
Joel's grandpa just passed away a few days ago, and somehow it's a comforting thought to know that he has gone home with the Lord after battling a deteriorating body and mind. The first time I visited him in the hospital was right after I came back from Mongolia, which makes it about a year since then. I did tell him I hope to see him before I come back, but... oh well. It is indeed such joy to know that we have a place to look forward at the end of this life, it's hard to let go, yes. But there is still so much more in store for us.
My niece who was just 13 years old, passed away a few weeks ago, very much to my atonishment. She was taken over by a bout of high fever, then quickly went into a brain-dead condition. After which her mother decided on euthanasia, and that was that, all in a short span of 2 weeks. It was such devastating news, for it simply shows that life is unpredictable, a fact we all know but often forget. Even more devastating to know that she had yet to know God. Hence in plain words, no place in heaven. The choice to believe is simple yet tough, and then comes the consequences we must all accept.
5/14/2007
Law, here
合理，不合法
合法，不合理
Still think that law should be fair and reasonable, to be law. Quoteth Woon Kwong during Jurisprudence, "Natural Law rocks!" ;p
合法，不合理
Still think that law should be fair and reasonable, to be law. Quoteth Woon Kwong during Jurisprudence, "Natural Law rocks!" ;p
Today
I met a Jew. He had a beard and a funny hat.
Today I met a Jew. And that made my day.
Of course this was apart from battling kids and a sweltering sun and battling kids and battling kids. Other than these, today was a fine sunny sunny day.
Today I met a Jew. And that made my day.
Of course this was apart from battling kids and a sweltering sun and battling kids and battling kids. Other than these, today was a fine sunny sunny day.
5/13/2007
White fluff
in the washing machine! Dumped my basket of clothes into the washing machine and put it to wash. An hour later came the poor machine gave a loud beeping sound so I opened the lid to see what happened and all I saw was white fluff!!!
White fluff all over my clothes and apparently the fluff has even jammed up the washing machine. I beat out the shirts and made an amazing snow storm in the kitchen but because the clothes were wet, they remained stubbornly spotted. Ugh! I must have accidentally put in a fantastic amount of tissue paper to cause this blizzard.
No photos because I was frantically trying to clean up after my folly before I became an embarrassment to my housemate!
White fluff all over my clothes and apparently the fluff has even jammed up the washing machine. I beat out the shirts and made an amazing snow storm in the kitchen but because the clothes were wet, they remained stubbornly spotted. Ugh! I must have accidentally put in a fantastic amount of tissue paper to cause this blizzard.
No photos because I was frantically trying to clean up after my folly before I became an embarrassment to my housemate!
Lovers, poets and madmen
A long quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream. I really really enjoyed myself at the performance, the Brit humour made it extra palatable. However, the Angmoh man-SPG girl couple, who were constantly making out with each other, beside me gave me the jitters. Quite a disgrace to Asian women, I thought. Even more so with broken English.
More strange than true: I never may believe
These antique fables, nor these fairy toys.
Lovers and madmen have such seething brains,
Such shaping fantasies, that apprehend
More than cool reason ever comprehends.
The lunatic, the lover and the poet
Are of imagination all compact:
One sees more devils than vast hell can hold,
That is, the madman: the lover, all as frantic,
Sees Helen's beauty in a brow of Egypt:
The poet's eye, in fine frenzy rolling,
Doth glance from heaven to earth, from earth to heaven;
And as imagination bodies forth
The forms of things unknown, the poet's pen
Turns them to shapes and gives to airy nothing
A local habitation and a name.
Such tricks hath strong imagination,
That if it would but apprehend some joy,
It comprehends some bringer of that joy;
Or in the night, imagining some fear,
How easy is a bush supposed a bear!
5/12/2007
Blocked
Blogspot is down again but surprisingly Blogger is accessible. I'll just try my luck out with this and bear with the restrictions for a while, after all this is precisely why I came to a foreign land for - to experience its culture, even if it doesn't quite suit me.
Laying down plans for the short time I have here. I am thinking of going to Tibet and stopping by Hongkong to meet up with my tall mortal, CP, Beth and Judyjudyjudy! I hope this works out, it makes me so thrilled thinking about it. At the same time, knowing that my exams end quite early makes me excited about going back, but not necessarily going back to things I actually look forward to, but things I have to work on and I probably need strength and loads of wisdom for that. And ah well, there's still the task of finding someone to rent my place before I leave. Bleagh.
Great news is that my sister will be visiting me in Beijing next week, and then there is Fangxi who will be taking some module in Peking University, and then Sida, Rachel and friends who will begin their backpacking tour starting from Beijing. It feels warm and fuzzy to know that there are visitors from Singapore, almost seems like my prayers about feeling lonely have been answered. Somewhat.
At the same time, I know this sounds like I'm never gonna really stop being restless and sit down and study but hey, I do realise I need to pass! Despite all the reassurance from my really friendly teachers and friends that passing is not a problem, it won't be difficult etc, I wouldn't dare to take chances with answering exam papers in Mandarin. ;p
Looking forward to watching A Midsummer Night's Dream later, and enjoying Gaiman's Sandman adaptation of it at the back of my head!
Laying down plans for the short time I have here. I am thinking of going to Tibet and stopping by Hongkong to meet up with my tall mortal, CP, Beth and Judyjudyjudy! I hope this works out, it makes me so thrilled thinking about it. At the same time, knowing that my exams end quite early makes me excited about going back, but not necessarily going back to things I actually look forward to, but things I have to work on and I probably need strength and loads of wisdom for that. And ah well, there's still the task of finding someone to rent my place before I leave. Bleagh.
Great news is that my sister will be visiting me in Beijing next week, and then there is Fangxi who will be taking some module in Peking University, and then Sida, Rachel and friends who will begin their backpacking tour starting from Beijing. It feels warm and fuzzy to know that there are visitors from Singapore, almost seems like my prayers about feeling lonely have been answered. Somewhat.
At the same time, I know this sounds like I'm never gonna really stop being restless and sit down and study but hey, I do realise I need to pass! Despite all the reassurance from my really friendly teachers and friends that passing is not a problem, it won't be difficult etc, I wouldn't dare to take chances with answering exam papers in Mandarin. ;p
Looking forward to watching A Midsummer Night's Dream later, and enjoying Gaiman's Sandman adaptation of it at the back of my head!
5/07/2007
Little thoughts
Said I would give an update and so I will. One thing I really want to blog about is how I'm greatly humbled by the Chinese Christians I have met so far. They all have a common trait so obvious you cannot possible miss - they are all fervent about their faith and eager to spread the Gospel. It's humbling, really to witness evangelism I never thought possible. They have such a succinct clear understanding and trust in their faith that makes it easy for them to speak out and reach out. Also, the analogies and reasonings I've heard so far are so easy to understand and relate to. I've been greatly greatly humbled. For all these times I thought myself as some sort of a salt and light, at least here to be one, yet like Chek told me God has greater plans for me. Experiences for me to learn from, to grow in. It has been an amazing journey and I know I can expect more from it. And I know I shall continue to be that salt and light I'm meant to be, to allow God's love to shine through me.
Another thing I learnt was having my own identity. I never thought I had any outstanding sins when the call was to ask God to search my heart to help me realise my sins. And so to allow Him to forgive them one by one. It suddenly dawned onto me today that I relish pride. I relish pride so much that I can't quite be alone. I need to feel accepted, to feel that I'm part of people's life. Little wonder why God put me in 五道口to learn to live by myself, to rely on Him wholeheartedly, to find my own identity. Not the sort of identity others have of me. I fear loneliness yet because I frequently thought of myself as a people person and need that sort of attention but God has slowly taught me to let go, to know that I can have that attention from Him and I don't need to frequently seek that attention from others, which I feel can be tiresome for either parties.
I thank God again for placing me here in China, in 五道口，allowing me to have such a different exchange experience, for hanging around with locals and learning to relate to different cultural backgrounds, a skill that Chris (the one in Mongolia) said I lacked or needed to be refined. I can only trust in Him to provide further plans and not be hasty in them. I need to stop counting down to July and settle down snuggly in God's wonderful plans.
One thing I've definitely learnt and need to be conscious of...
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.
你们要靠主常常喜乐。我再说，你们要喜乐。当叫众人知道你们谦让的心。主已经近了。
Philippians/腓立比书 4:4-5
These little angels are like my cheerleaders :)
Another thing I learnt was having my own identity. I never thought I had any outstanding sins when the call was to ask God to search my heart to help me realise my sins. And so to allow Him to forgive them one by one. It suddenly dawned onto me today that I relish pride. I relish pride so much that I can't quite be alone. I need to feel accepted, to feel that I'm part of people's life. Little wonder why God put me in 五道口to learn to live by myself, to rely on Him wholeheartedly, to find my own identity. Not the sort of identity others have of me. I fear loneliness yet because I frequently thought of myself as a people person and need that sort of attention but God has slowly taught me to let go, to know that I can have that attention from Him and I don't need to frequently seek that attention from others, which I feel can be tiresome for either parties.
I thank God again for placing me here in China, in 五道口，allowing me to have such a different exchange experience, for hanging around with locals and learning to relate to different cultural backgrounds, a skill that Chris (the one in Mongolia) said I lacked or needed to be refined. I can only trust in Him to provide further plans and not be hasty in them. I need to stop counting down to July and settle down snuggly in God's wonderful plans.
One thing I've definitely learnt and need to be conscious of...
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.
你们要靠主常常喜乐。我再说，你们要喜乐。当叫众人知道你们谦让的心。主已经近了。
Philippians/腓立比书 4:4-5
These little angels are like my cheerleaders :)
5/06/2007
神阿！你的言语在我上膛何等甘美
Just got back from 白洋淀. I really enjoyed myself and learnt a lot simply by being beside, listening, mentally taking down notes of things happening around me. I must say I was really impressed by what I experienced but for some reasons I shall save it to tell you face to face. :) I have a problem with handling information online. Sigh.
But still, thank God so much for this precious opportunity. I have indeed been reminded of being earnest for God and to start doing certain things that have been bugging my heart ever since...too much thinking and pondering, I fear.
The trip however, has left me feeling a bit tired and hence I shall write about God's goodness another time, in another entry. It's our 23rd month today, or rather yesterday and it's really great to journey on the well-lit path, hand-in-hand. Another interesting thing includes the night cycling trip back which I missed, I heard Joel passed Mark and Clara their commie hats which we had bargained so hard for and I'm amused by the mental image of them cycling down the streets of Singapore with a large furry winter cap. Another less interesting thing is that AGM is a few hours away, and I'm vaguely tickled by how things have turned out.
Which makes me miss VCF somehow, especially the uncontrolled laughter that we share. More detailed updates, soon.
But still, thank God so much for this precious opportunity. I have indeed been reminded of being earnest for God and to start doing certain things that have been bugging my heart ever since...too much thinking and pondering, I fear.
The trip however, has left me feeling a bit tired and hence I shall write about God's goodness another time, in another entry. It's our 23rd month today, or rather yesterday and it's really great to journey on the well-lit path, hand-in-hand. Another interesting thing includes the night cycling trip back which I missed, I heard Joel passed Mark and Clara their commie hats which we had bargained so hard for and I'm amused by the mental image of them cycling down the streets of Singapore with a large furry winter cap. Another less interesting thing is that AGM is a few hours away, and I'm vaguely tickled by how things have turned out.
Which makes me miss VCF somehow, especially the uncontrolled laughter that we share. More detailed updates, soon.
5/01/2007
Some photos
Thought it would be injustice not to show some photos of my Beijing frolicks alongside four good mates. But as you can see, I can't quite figure out how to use the photo display function on Blogger. Ah, well. More photos at Flickr if you are interested. It's so lovely to have people visiting you from home, I really treasured the short one week and wished it had somehow never really ended even though it was horribly tiring. I wish I had learnt to treasure the time spent much earlier, rather than coping with that sense of loss after they left.
Somehow the topic of marriage has been popping up quite frequently ever since I got to Beijing. It seems as though one of the most pressing concerns of the people I hang out with. I've been to some talks about marriage and romantic relationships, seen a frenzied match-making session take place in Hangzhou, discussed this topic numerous times. Not to mention that Jianming and Jo, Kelvin and Grace are getting married next month. It's unnerving, really...especially when you're so far away from your other half and getting tad used to feeling single and doing things without him. And almost forgetting things...I guess thank goodness I'm only here for less than half a year. And I do wish that he was around having the same sort of experience I have here...
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